I woke up this morning feeling I had made the right decision.But I am extremely emotional and crying a lot. To be honest I still feel pulled in two directions. But I too am looking forward to working on this. I think that we need to treat it as if we're dating again though and not push too hard too fast to get to a certain point. We've been a long way apart for a long time and as much as it would be nice there is no waving a magic wand and making everything go to the way we want it to be. I too have been thinking about things that might help us work through this. I think we need to call Holly and Brian and set up a session for ASAP. I like the idea of doing something on Tuesday. I'm not sure what exactly. I need to start going back to the gym and since tomorrow is my first day back at work I was thinking I'd start Tuesday morning though I could put if off to Wed. but no later then that. I need to go to the gym to deal with my stress and be in my own head where I'm not thinking about anything but walking on the treadmill and not falling off while I'm reading.

Somethings that I've realized is that as Jamie and Shane came back together, they stopped ignoring each other's phone calls. I promise to answer the phone when you call no matter who it is I'm talking to, except for if I'm talking to Jacob.

I still want to go to Disney...

I want to plan trips to different places where we can take the dogs and just go and have fun on the weekends. We did it when I worked 40hrs before so I don't know why we can't do it again.

I want to sell this house...We can decide if we want another house or a condo, right now my vote is for a condo. I need to be closer to work and I do eventually want to start working with hospice patients. I need to be doing that somewhere. I realize Brandford would be a long commute for you, but maybe we can find something inbtwn.

I know that in the past you've suggested we play pool, but I think it's time we got cable and maybe even a Wi-ii. I think doing agility with Norman will be good.

If you want to join the gym with me that's fine, but I know you'd rather walk outside and the dogs so love it that I'm not sure it makes sense.

When planning some of our weekends I'd like to go places where I can have a spa treatment or something and you can hike or whatever during that time and then we can come back together. (I think this is important because as you pointed out you can't be a girlfriend for me, but those are things that I'd do with a girlfriend and I don't mind doing them alone once in awhile.)

I also want you to continue to pursue hiking or kayaking groups so that there are people you can do things with. I want to be able to go and spend the weekend with my girlfriends and not have it be an issue. I think we both need to have that kind of time. Because as much as we might want we can't be everything to each other all the time.

Okay, I guess you can tell I've been thinking about a lot of stuff.

I think the biggest thing you have to know is that I'm VERY EMOTIONAL AND THIS WHOLE THING IS VERY EMOTIONAL FOR ME.

Love, Sue